PONDERING

Now don’t get me wrong; social media is great. However, naturally we have the tendency to use it as a showcase for the great stuff that is going on in our lives. It’s a place where accolades and achievements are shared, dressing up to look our best and nights out with friends are exposed and the highlights of travel adventures are boasted. Though there’s nothing wrong with these things – we have to be aware that we’re building a culture that hides behind the mask of social media.

Something that’s been challenging yet encouraging to me recently is the power in our vulnerability.

We live in a vulnerable world thus in-turn we numb vulnerability. We selectively numb certain emotions (such as fear, sadness, shame); but when we do, we numb everything (joy, love, peace). It’s a mask we wear to depict perfection.

Let’s break through this mask. Let’s wear a cloak of vulnerability. Let’s be authentic. Let’s be REAL.

Let’s have the courage to be imperfect. Let’s let go of who we think we should be, to be who we truly are and stop trying to live up to this ideal of perfection in a broken world. No one is perfect and everyone is wired for struggle, but we are worthy of love and belonging. Let’s have courage in owning who we are and actually LOVING that.

The beauty of who you really are shines through in your brokenness.

Vulnerability is not weakness.

Brene Brown has done heaps of research into vulnerability and found that the ‘whole-hearted’ live in vulnerability which makes them feel embraced, beautiful, necessary. This vulnerability is the birthplace of joy, creativity, love and worth.

Vulnerability is at the core to transformation.

Let’s create a shift in the cultural norms.

Stepping out in vulnerability is pretty petrifying – standing up in Church and telling part of my story (oh and for the online download world) made me feel incredibly vulnerable, it’s allowing ourselves to be truly deeply seen, it’s owning who we truly are. We have to break the patterns of avoiding being truly seen for fear of how we will be received.

So I am going to pursue vulnerability. I am going to try to be openly broken, authentic and real in the fallen world that we live in. Because, through this choice to be vulnerable I have faith that God will show his almighty, powerful, healing strength; and it’s all about his glory.

Hold me accountable!

I’ll keep you posted.

Self-esteem: the beliefs a person holds about themselves, their ability to make decisions and deal with the circumstances they face in life.

The UK has one of the highest rates of self-harm in Europe

In the UK, 1 in 100 women aged between 15 and 30 suffers from anorexia
1 in 4 16 year old girls know of someone else who has been hurt or hit by someone they are dating

These statistics are merely a glimpse of the issues facing young girls today.

We became increasingly aware of the issues facing young girls today throughout secondary school, then affecting their life post education. Secondary school is a time of rapid change, growth and challenges. Thus, there are overwhelming effects that poor self-worth can initiate (such as depression, eating disorders, self-harm, anxiety, suicide etc.). Although we recognise there are some websites/charities that operate – they aren’t always easily accessed. In Berkshire alone there is a waiting list for child services of 18 months. With this in mind we wanted to create an organisation that can signpost to multi-agencies and to support girls on discovering their value, identity and purpose and then proceed to walk alongside them in their journey. This gave birth to ‘Belle’, a non-profit organisation in 2015.

Founder: Jessie Faerber. I am currently studying a Bsc in Theology and Youth Ministry at St.Mellitus College and work as a Youth Worker across Warfield Church.

Belle is an organisation with a Christian ethos to equip, encourage and empower young girls in Berkshire.

VISION: to inspire hope into the lives of young girls governed by issues surrounding self-esteem.

Belle aims to tackle issues surrounding self-esteem in 3 key ways;

· equipping; value, identity and purpose

· encouraging; mentoring

· empowering; social media

Belle aims to work alongside schools and youth groups in Berkshire to inspire hope into the lives of our young girls who are governed by issues of self-esteem through equipping, encouraging and empowering.

Belle focuses on working with girls between the ages of 11 and 18 (but also recognises an increasing need in Primary Schools – something Belle will be exploring).

For Belle to be most effective we aim to build in 3 core elements outlined below:

1. equipping; value, identity, purpose:

We are fully trained facilitators of Cocoon; a 6/10 week course for a small group of girls, focusing on their personal value, identity and purpose. The course contains links for the National Curriculum in both PSHE & Wellbeing and Citizenship. It is a brilliant, all- encompassing, tried course that covers areas such as value, feelings and emotions, interests and skills, personality, body image, media and appearance, dreams and aspirations and planning for the future.

“Cocoon is an exciting and fresh course which allows young women to delve into their complex feelings and explore emotions healthily. The course allows today’s media driven young people to take a step back and evaluate who they really are and what they want out of life, giving them practical ways to face everyday situations and challenges”

Head of PSHE, Sutton Academy

2. encouraging; mentoring:

We offer an opportunity to mentor (and have a level 5 certificate in Christian Mentoring) within a school or youth group; to meet more personably in a one-to-one setting with a young girl as a listening ear in a safe and controlled environment. It is important to offer girls the opportunity to have someone to speak to about a range of issues; to be someone who cares. We are firm believers that through building relationships with young people, we can inspire hope and initiate positive change. Mentoring provides the opportunity to do so.

NB: We are not fully qualified counselors. Our role as a mentor is to listen and to provide relevant and appropriate ‘signposts’ or referrals where required.

3. empowering; social media:

We have created a social media presence on Facebook and Twitter in order to continually equip, encourage and therefore empower young girls through the sharing of relevant pages, articles, resources etc. that cover issues surrounding self-esteem. This is in order to counteract the many issues facing girls that we believe have stemmed from social media.

The aim is to eventually have a personal messaging dimension to the social media presence in order to discuss issues in a regulated and controlled manner.

See facebook.com/belleberkshire and twitter.com/belle_inspire.

For more information contact jessie.faerber@warfield.org.uk

I'll keep you posted.